I have not been a good blogger in the last few months. I have gotten fairly overwhelmed with things in analog life and, unfortunately, have let my digital life slide to the wayside. I have two blogs that have just been languishing in the dark. Poor things. I really need to make a more concentrated effort on blogging. Maybe I will take this new time I have set aside in my schedule to do that.
The midwifery education trudges on. I won’t bore you with details here, but if you want to, you can keep track of that portion of my life over at Birthing Journey.
I generally hate personal rants and diatribes on blogs. I tend to gloss over. And if you want to gloss over this one, you are totally allowed to, of course. But I gotta put it out into the world cause it is driving me absolutely batty as of late.
See, the thing is… Parenting is really hard. And I get that. I really do. I’ve been doing it for nigh on 13 years myself. I get it. It’s the hardest job we will ever, ever be given.
That doesn’t however excuse you from being a responsible member of society and, more importantly, teaching your children how to be responsible members of their society!
Case in point– We’ve been planning on The Boy taking a school trip to Mexico for about six months now. Within the last month, there has been torrential rain and mudslides in the area that they would have been spending the majority of their time. The village has been evacuated and when the residents begin to return, they will be filling the majority of the accommodations available because their homes have been destroyed. This left us with the option of sending the kids to Mexico, but having them remain in Mexico City with no definite itinerary or plan, or canceling the trip all together and receive airline vouchers for the kids’ tickets. To me, this was an incredibly logical choice. These are 11, 12, and 13 year old children, ten of them to be exact, with three parent chaperons and one teacher. In one of the largest cities in the world. With one of the highest crime rates (one police officer was killed and one was injured PER WEEK in 1997!) With one of the worst cases of pollution in the world. Not exactly a place I want my 12 year old spending 6 days without a very definite plan.
Their teacher made the very fair decision to allow the parents to decide what we would do. She created a group email asking for opinions, ideas, etc. Most of us remained fairly civil. There was some disagreement, but the overall decision was whatever was best for everyone involved. Except for one mother. She absolutely refused to actually read any of the emails that were being sent to her. Every single response sent from her end was typed in bold capital letters. If she wasn’t given an answer within 20 minutes, she would send another ranty email to the group bitching about the teacher’s irresponsibility in the middle of the school day. You know, when the teacher was busy educating our children! To topo it all off, she suggested that the teacher should be required to sell her airfare voucher and divide the money among the parents. As some form of punishment! *exasperated sigh* And she made sure to tell us every step of the way, that she was consulting her daughter for opinions with each step in the process. Her 11 year old daughter. Let me make that clear:
- She was relying on a child to make a very adult decision (COME ON! If I asked The Boy what he wanted, he would gladly go to Mexico City by himself! Who cares about safety, logistics, planning…)
- In a very heated ADULT conversation, she was keeping her kid updated on what other parents and teachers were saying, including her own ranting which was not in anyway forgiving of the teacher or the school for that matter. There were a number of bold and direct insults about the school and the individual teacher in all of her emails.
In my eyes, she has basically been showing her child the entire time, that if things don’t go exactly the way she plans and wants, she can throw whatever kind of fit she wants. Screaming and stomping your feet are not only allowed but encouraged. Insults, rudeness, and inappropriate anger are expected.
This is not the only example of this type of behavior that I have seen during The Boy’s educational years, just the most recent and fresh in my mind. And it makes me so very sad and disheartened. Here I am working so hard to raise not only a healthy and happy individual, but a healthy and happy individual who takes pride in being a valued part of his communities (both macro and micro).
What happened to teaching our children good communication skills? Compromise? Humility and humbleness? How about common decency and manners?
Posted by Amelia on Dec 5, 2008 in
Holidailies 2008,
Holidays 2008,
Parenting So today is the start of Holidailies. Now since I suck at remembering to blog daily, I cannot be required to blog daily AND write up a summary AND remember to update the Holidailies website. I’ve decided to just do the Holidailies at Home project, which is basically updating daily, but none of the other mularkey. We all saw how my two attempts at NaBloPoMo went. We’ll see how this goes. I’ll try. Really I will.
Each day of the project they offer a writing prompt. I *love* writing prompts and so, I will absolutely be following those. Today’s prompt: Introduce Yourself.
I’m pretty sure that everybody that reads this blog already knows me for the most part. If you don’t, well, thanks. I can’t imagine that my writing is interesting even to those folks that do know me, so if you are reading it for the joy of reading, I’m sorry. *smile*
So, I suppose, who am I today, right now.
Right now I am one excited mama. My son, The Boy, is at a sleepover. Doesn’t seem like much for the parents of the average 11 year old boy. But The Boy struggles pretty bad with social skills. He tries really hard. He has tons of friends in class, but the follow through has not always been so good. Yesterday afternoon he went home with his friend after class and played until 9 o’clock and then his friend’s mom asked if he wanted to come spend the night tonight, as long as both boys got their homeschool work done. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him finish his work so quickly and completely! So, as of right about now, I’m sure they are eatin’ pizza and watching a movie or shooting each other with nurf guns or whatever it is that boys do at sleepovers. I’m sure they don’t paint nails or give manicures or make prank calls to boys. Or maybe they do. Who knows. Who cares! It’s his very first ever sleepover and I’m so excited for him.
Right now I’m a disappointed craft shopper. We just got home from shopping at the 2008 Nocoast Craft-O-Rama. I’m a big fan of the Indie craft industry. I really and truly am. I could look at stuff on Etsy for hours and hours. I really wanted to find some gifts for a few different people. But everything was just….well the same. It was disappointing really. There was lots and lots of beautiful work, really. But there just didn’t seem to be a whole lot of variety. Lots of the same stuff on different tables. I don’t know. That’s not really the way that I want to describe it, because really, there was GORGEOUS stuff all over the place. But in the end, I felt like there just wasn’t anything all that uniquely exciting. We did find a great print for our new place by Lonny Unitus, and I found a print that I’m considering ordering directly from the artist, only because it has my new favorite saying on it:
So for right now: Today I Will Be Happier Than A Bird With A French Fry.
Since it is November 1, and the lovely PoppyMom has requested that W and I complete:
And so, here I am at 6:30 on November 1, typing away on the blog.
Halloween went fantastically. I really started panicking on Wednesday night when I realized just how little I had completed on The Boy’s costume. Truthfully, I am usually on my final fitting and have done at least one full dress rehearsal by a week prior to the big event, and here it was two days before and I had yet to finish cutting out pattern pieces. I spent most of the day Thursday sweating and near tears thinking about it, but not being able to do much as I had picked up a few freelance projects and had a deadline to meet. Friday morning I woke up and immediately began working. I didn’t move from the kitchen table all day. What came out of it was not nearly as technically marvelous as some of my previous creations, and I ended up giving up on the arms and legs portions, but I realized about 3/4 the way through it that *any* homemade costume now-days makes me an incredibly awesome mom. And the fact that while we were trick-or-treating, I saw a number of children with no costume at all? Yep. I feel ok about my half-assed costume design this year. Besides, I’m a makeup supergenius, so as long as I had a clean pallet to be able to coat The Boy’s face with gorgeousness, all was well. Of course, I realized now this morning as I’m uploading photos that I didn’t seem to get a single decent shot of the entire body of the costume and that the lighting outside was not particularly flattering, but you’ll get the general idea.
He really isn’t as miserable as he looks. The makeup makes him look particularly pouty.
We spent about an hour wandering in our neighborhood, which has changed significantly in the last six years! We lived here with The Boy was five and moved away until this last summer. Back then, one of the first Halloween nights he can remember, there were virtually no children in the area. It’s an artsy, trendy area that has been gentrified to hell and back, but then it was all young hipsters. Based on last night though? Hipsters are growing up and having babies! There were quite a few ghosts and ghouls, and a number of pirates and butterflies, wandering the neighborhood with bags of treats. The Boy was obviously among the older kiddos, but it was nice to see families in this area.
The Professor stopped by on his way home from work to check out the costume and walk a block or two with us, and then we headed down to W’s best friend’s new house. They were pretty excited about getting trick-or-treaters for the first time and we loved the fact that they had candy for kiddos and cocktails for the grown-ups! Pumpkin coffee syrup and tequila make a delicious little beverage. While W sat and chatted with friends, The Boy and I finished off two more blocks (both sides, as he insisted). The amount of candy that kid accumulated is truly amazing. And not a single sticker, pencil, or toothbrush in the lot! He did get a bag of Doritos, but we all thought that was kind of cool, considering the amount of sugar you injest on Halloween. Who doesn’t need a salty little snack at the end of it all?
Ok, even though I’m titling this post with Ministry lyrics, it is such a mommy blog post that I may need to shoot myself when I finish.
This week has been the total panic of “Oh, Gods! Friday is Halloween and I have done little to nothing to prepare my child!” Generally I am a Halloween fanatic. I have costumes planned months in advance and by the week before I only have a final fitting and makeup trial to complete before everything is perfect. My house is decorated. I have plotted and planned the best candy acquiring route for The Boy. This year, for some reason, things just fell to the wayside. And here it is Wednesday, with the big day falling on Friday of this week, and I am just now getting things figured out.
I’m not going to wreck the surprise of the costume until the day of, but let’s just say that this is our most challenging costume to date.
The first few years of The Boy’s Halloween adventures were pretty standard toddler costumes, but starting at age 6, he began dressing as the Universal Studios monsters.
Age 6: Wolfman
Age 7: Invisible Man
Age 8: Mummy
Age 9: Dracula
Age 10: Frankenstein’s Monster
Age 11: Can you guess it? It’s hard. It’s fancy. It involves extensive make up. And the following supplies:
Camo footie pajamas, two yards each of two different green faux-leathers, and a yard and a half of green lycra. (Ignore the nosy dog. He’s not part of the costume!)
A white swim cap that was hand painted forest green (the picture makes it look much brighter than it is). This was originally supposed to be a bald cap that I would either paint or use sponged makeup to change to a lovely shade of green, but three stores later, I gave up and purchased a white swim cap instead.
A the final photo of my hand with various makeup mixing techniques being tested out on the back of it. The top one obviously won.
And no, The Boy’s costume has absolutely nothing to do with the military or really being camouflaged at all. It was just a great base for the costume and was an easy way to keep him warm.
Stay tuned for Friday when I’ll post photos of the actual costume and all our secrets will be revealed.
Tags: Ha
And as the lovely W would say, Chicken Dinner.
We went to the last Lynx home game of the season last night. It was fan appreciation night and we weren’t about to miss out on the glorious free wrist bands! Little did we know that we would be leaving with essentially an entire souvenier shop full of things.
About ten minutes into the first quarter, one of the Lynx interns sat down behind us and asked if we wanted to play some of the time out games. We finally decided that I would take part in the Candance Wiggins Match Game, while W and The Boy™ would ride tricycles in a race during the fourth quarter.
Of course, immediately, my nerves started to rattle. I am not into public appearances. They scare the begeezus out of me. And yet, I was going to be standing in front of somewhere around 5,000 people (if the averages shown on the WNBA site are even somewhat accurate). AND displayed on the stupid megatron. I *hate* videos/televised images of myself. So pretty much all I could think of for the remainder of the game was the stupid quiz during the third quarter.
It was, honestly, the most fun we have had at a game thus far. I won my contest and received a Lynx prize pack which was two t-shirts in a fancy bag. W and The Boy™ took third place and won three t-shirts. And they caught a sixth shirt at the end of the game from one of the players. Grand total: Six T-shirts. One game. Nice.
See? There I am sitting on the floor in the green shirt waiting patiently for my turn!
With B96′s B-Right reading the questions
So, the Match Game works like this: They show you a video clip of Candace Wiggins giving you the first portion of a phrase, and you have to write down what you think is the second half. If you match what the player has on their board, you win. My phrase was 3 _______. The answer was pointer. That’s my answer sheet on the megatron up there!
One more of me on the big board, cause I think my 15 minutes of fame ends here.
The Boy™ waiting for the race.
So fast, he is just a blur!
Practicing in the tunnel before the race!
I’m realizing this morning that my weekends now officially start on Wednesday. The new arrangement with The Boy™ is that he is with his pops from Saturday afternoon until Wednesday morning before school, and then I pick him up Wednesday afterschool and he is with me until Saturday. It’s perfect for all involved really. He attends a school which is only in session Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. On Thursday and Friday he is homeschooled with direction from the school via the internet. Since The Professor™ works during the day, it would be virtually impossible for him to be home with The Boy™ for those homeschooled days. My job gives me the freedom to be there with him. It is the perfect 50/50 split of the week, allowing both of us as parents to get half of the weekend for grownup life, while still having the kiddo with us for a weekend day. It’s ideal.
And so, today, being Wednesday is the start of my weekend.
I’ve begun attending the Twin Cities Women’s Choir on Wednesday nights as well, so W and The Boy™ will be on their own. From what I understand, tonight that means they are watching television and making calzones. She is really adjusting beautiful to having an 11 year old child around half of the time. Ninty percent of me knew from the beginning that she would be great with him. Hell, she’s a kid herself some of the time. But I never figured she would just jump right in and become such an integral part of his life. I am so grateful and thankful for that. It has made the transition so much easier on him.
Posted by Amelia on Aug 27, 2008 in
160 Lbs of Boxer Love,
Parenting,
Travel,
W I haven’t had alot of interesting things to talk about lately. Things have really just fallen into a nice little clip and life is as it should be.
We’re preparing for a weekend of camping in the great North East…that is North East of the Twin Cities near Taylor’s Falls. We’ll be heading out on Friday as soon as W finishes work, and sticking it out until sometime on either Sunday or Monday. We went camping within three weeks of meeting each other at the beginning of the summer, so this is a good way for us to close out this summer.
The most exciting part of it though is that I will get to take my dog! And he will finally be coming to live with us! I cannot wait to have my baby with me. The last month has been hell without seeing him on a regular basis.
The Boy™ is also scheduled to come home from visiting his grandmother this weekend. So, all in all, I’m getting everything that makes me happiest in the world! Camping with my girl, having my dog by my side, and my kiddo home safe and sound. All in one weekend.
Today I’ll be running errands to prepare for the weekend. I have a waxing appointment at 12:15 to get rid of the bear hair that has been growing on my legs for a couple weeks now. The last time I had them done was Pride week, so we’re looking at almost 8 weeks of growth. ICK! I need to make an appointment today before I *leave* the salon for six weeks, maximum! I always tell myself that I will call and make an appointment when I get home and then I put it off until I look and feel like big foot!
After that I have to run to SuperTarget to get groceries for the camping trip and possibly a stop at the car wash to vacuum out the car. We’ll see how far I go.
Every fall I go a little crazy and knit up about 20 hats and a shitload of scarves. Mostly because I have learned with The Boy™ is completely incapable of having one hat/scarf set last him more than a few weeks. If Boy Scouts taught me anything it was Be Prepared! The preparations start today with that lovely little ball of yarn up there.
126 days. Really! There are 126 days until Christmas. I know for the average person, this is plenty of time. But for me, the Queen of OCD, the Princess of Planning, the Empress of….oh to heck with it, let’s just remember that I literally do have OCD and not being absolutely prepared for something really drives me up a wall. I usually have my shopping list prepared no later than Halloween and unless you’ve been living under a rock you know that the day after Thanksgiving is Black Friday. All of the stores go insane with their specials and deals on Black Friday. My family has always wanted to be among the wackos that are standing at the Walmart door at 4am waiting to be crushed in the ensuing riots, but last year I learned my lesson and settled in to my keyboard with a hot cup of coffee. The same deals, if not better, are offered on the store websites and I didn’t have to get up at the crack of dawn!
SO, when I found this website,Black Friday, I was just about thrilled.
It’s not just a typical Black Friday site. Those are all over the place. This one has a bunch of other features that make it just…well…better. They will email you an alert when a new ad is posted. It looks like they will eventually provide some shopping list capabilities. YAY LISTS! I’ve already added it to my bookmark list. I’m pretty thrilled by the selection of stores available. They even have The Microcenter Ad, which the geek in me freaks out about and the Toys R Us deals which the mom in me could cry over!
Yep. The shopping season has never been more exciting for me. Or so organized.
Posted by Amelia on Jul 26, 2008 in
Co-parenting,
Parenting,
W Or really, when you thinking about it….1 league is about 3 miles, so more like .5 Leagues Under The Mall of America.
Back over two months ago now, W promised The Boy™ a trip to Underwater Adventures Aquarium for his birthday. This weekend was the first of the last eight which was unscheduled enough that we were able to get out there! It hasn’t changed much since the last time I was there, but it still instantly brings a deep level of calm to me. Something about watching all the slow and graceful fish floating around above me just slows my heart rate and leaves me ready for a nap
They even sat still on this lovely brass tortoise long enough for me to snap a touristy photograph before they ran off to go t-shirt shopping at Old Navy. It’s definitely an addiction they share. Old Navy t-shirts. I believe they both walked out with two new ones on Saturday.
I dropped W back off at the apartment and headed over to Saint Paul to take The Boy™ to family dinner with his dad. We had Culver’s and I got to taunt W the rest of the weekend about my experience in the Land Of Butter Burger. (I can’t stand the things, instead I had a fantastic ham and swiss sandwich.)
That night we played homebodies. Neither of us was up to going out, though I kept asking W if she wanted to meet up with her friends somewhere. Instead, we ended up sitting at the coffee table, drinking our respective beers (Leinenkugel’s Berryweis for W and Grainbelt Premium for me) and playing Trivial Pursuit 90s Edition. Oh yes. We partied hard on Saturday. Oh yes. So hard.
